Ms. America

Running out the door late for class as usual, I jumped into the elevator and just barely made it in as it was closing (I try and make my 007 appearances as much as possible). Catching my breath as the elevator door closed, my neighbour who was standing next to me struck up a conversation about the Ms. America pageant that had just finished. Even though I've lived in California my entire life, being the person I am, I was clueless to most of the popular things going on in America, aside from watching LOST online, I don't have much of a connection and my friends frequently joke with me about this. My neighbour, a larger woman in her late fifties, asked me if I had seen the Ms. America pageant last night. I smiled as usual and shook my head saying that I hadn't and that I've never actually seen one. She exclaimed, " Ohhh a Muslim girl won!". Shocked, my mouth hung open in a half gasp half laugh, I set my two ton bag on the hand-rail in disbelief. Here I had this delusional image of a beautiful hijabi girl clothed in a long flowing white gown, graciously accepting some kind of award. Her family would be in the front row cheering her on, and little children would come bringing her roses while a dozen doves are released in her honour. There wouldn't be a dry eye in the house. Obviously I have no idea how these things worked. No sooner was I beaming when my neighbour added, "yeah she wore a bikini!" It was one of those daydream moments where you're listening to beautiful music and then you hear the record scratch and fall off the track. "Oh.." I said, awakening abruptly. "Yeah..." she said giving me an off look. "That's not very traditional...is it?" she asked me sincerely. I looked at her and smiled "Oh, no, not really...at all...". She nodded and said, "well, I like the way you dress!" as she left the elevator and the doors closed behind her. Surprised at her genuine liking of my loose long clothes and my hijab covering my hair, I felt the respect that I rarely feel with other Americans, and many times other Muslims who don't wear hijab. I felt really good about myself. Of course people will disagree with my choice to wear it, but I wear it for Allah. It doesn't phase me from wanting to wear it. But it is a wonderful feeling, and almost a relief when someone not only accepts your right to wear, respects your right to wear it, but actually admires you for wearing it. I would be lieing if I said I've received no hostility or harassment from people because of how I dress. I feel out of place in many settings where women walk around in loud clicking high-heals, bikinis, dresses the sizes of t-shirts, or jeans so tight and make-up so thick they may as well be painted on. But I also feel proud in those settings. Proud that I can still feel beautiful without baring it all, or highlighting my face with make-up, and I don't know many western women who would feel comfortable enough to go out of the house in the morning without at least some eyeliner and lipstick. They attract attention superficially, and I attract attention in another way. A personal way. I attract attention with the way I speak and use my mind. I attract attention with my actions. I attract attention with my character. With my hijab I feel there's a light around me protecting me as I walk, and I feel so close to Allah the One Creator. Someone once argued with me that beauty should be shared with everyone and not hidden. I told him it's my choice not to "share" my body, and if he thinks beauty is only on the outside, well that's unfortunate for him! Thank You to all the Muslims and especially the non-Muslims who give us your support, and thank you for having the courage to tell us you admire the way we are. Jazakallah Kheirun.

O' Qibla Where Art Thou?

A few days ago I was sitting at the gas station behind the counter with two of the employees, my brothers in Islam as well as my dear friends. Asr prayer was approaching and I went to make wuzu (ablution) as they took my place behind the counter. When I came back, ready to pray, I heard one of them taunting the other. "He doesn't know where Kaba is", he told me. I looked up at my friend with quizzical yet sincere eyes, "you don't?". He smiled shyly and a bit embarrassed and stuttered trying to think of some excuse, but it wasn't necessary. I turned to the other and said, "So why don't you tell him where it is?". Then he looked down laughing a bit caught off his guard. He said "I kept telling him he's praying the wrong way, and that he should be facing this way", he said pointing over my shoulder. "But he wouldn't listen". I looked at both of their stubborn faces as they stared grinning at each-other, cousins! "Okay", I said sitting back up on the stool behind the counter and gesturing towards the laptop in front of me with my palm, "Why don't we look it up?" My friend who said he knew which way to pray hopped on the laptop and typed in how to find the direction on google. After figuring out where our location was on the map and which angle to point the screen, we came up with the solution that although my friend had been wrong, my other friend was slightly off course himself, just by a few degrees. True, now if I ever have to pray in the gas station I know which direction to face, but my point is people get so defensive about little things that they forget about helping each other. And if you tell someone and they don't listen and you blame them for not heeding your advice, what if your advice is wrong? What then? These two friends are like my family, and I'd never hold it against them, they are simply an example of every day habits we all develop over time. Maybe we do this most to people we love and care about, because we know that they will love us unconditionally. Perhaps we become stubborn in our ways because we live in America, and we want to show that we're holding onto our faith and we know what we're talking about. But in doing that, sometimes we just prove the opposite. Sure my other friend could have checked online, but perhaps he didn't know that it was available online, I certainly didn't. Some people don't even have computers let alone internet, and maybe even electricity is not as readily available as we might think. It's a luxury we often take for granted. Listed below is a link that can guide you electronically towards the direction of the Kaba once you've typed in your location. But remember, if you're unsure of the direction at the time of your prayer, give your intentions in your heart that you wish to pray in the direction of the Kaba, Allah knows everything, and Allah is the Most Gracious and Kind.

http://www.qibla.com.br/

Al Mu'minun

"Until, when death comes to one of them, he says, ‘O my Lord. Send me back to life. In order that I may do good deeds in the things that I neglected.’ By no means! It is but a word he says. And before them is a barzakh until the day they are raised up." (Qur'an Al Mu’minun ; 99-100)